On An Evening

I took these photos on my phone, edited them a bit and they made me so happy. Why? Because it features my room! Now that I’m in my final semester A.K.A battle of the thesis, a lot of hours, especially the evenings will be spent here. However, I’m feeling extra special about it right now, since not only I have tidied up my room a little bit to prepare myself for the next 6 months of uni, but I have made it a sanctuary. I don’t know how to feel about it, whether to be mad or relieved but it just occurred to me despite how late it is, that I have never poured so much attention on this particular space of my house.

So, I have recently changed my bedsheets and added in a tenun throw that my Mom got at our favorite all-stop store for anything ethnic in Jogja. Next, I dragged our Poang chair from IKEA that was previously in our living room to be placed near my window which would be lovely during the daytime because for those who know me I’m a die-hard fan of natural light and being curled up by glass windows of any size and shape. I cleaned up, sorted out everything that made my trusty old desk super stuffy despite how it is supposed to ergonomically (kudos to my friend who introduced this word to me!) fit all of my junk. It’s now filled with just the necessities from stationaries, important files, books (I know, I know, it’s plural, haha), my film cameras, film rolls, even a radio, and my stack of candles. I’m much looking forward to sit and be finishing up my thesis here!

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Anyway, I’ve never truly realized how a well thought-out, comfortable nest that you make of yourself does wonders for your mind and well being. For example, after a class or a thesis consultation, it would feel so nice to come home, clean up, eat, and then wind down in my room. Light up a candle, turn on some lo-fi music, read a couple of pages and just rest. In other words, a sanctuary of your own is going to make splitting up, say, work and life that much easier. When I feel like I have fed myself with enough wind-down time, I could happily return to my desk for some more typing before bed!

For the past three days I’ve spent at home, I feel like I’m in such a happier state especially with this new set-up I’ve got going on. I wake up rejuvenated and I’m always feeling so content going to bed and being on my own, it’s definitely quite an experience and simple things like this I think is going to help me. It’s easy for me, personally to lose myself in an admittedly bad habit of mine, which is overthinking. There are times where I would feel lonely, uncertain, but now that I’ve found this state of mind, with the hope of my room, I hope to channel that into my thesis, into the books I’m reading, into writing, because I know there’s nowhere else that I can put my head…and to be honest, I have been neglecting my room – a personal and intimate space where I should have been able to find some peace of mind after a long day. And as mundane or simple this seems, I’m so happy to have reclaimed a space where I feel more settled. In the upcoming months ahead I’m excited to finish my thesis, spend hours by the window sipping a cup of coffee and finally reading again, writing blog posts, journaling – generally kicking off a new year by being kinder to myself…

Here’s to 2019, everyone. Cheers.